The Death of Reason
by Pulchrite
Summary: Anna learns the difference between peaceful love and intense passion. T: light sensuality
1. Declivity

**Declivity**

The sunlight began to wane in the distance as darkness enveloped the sky. Clouds leaked the moisture as droplets at first, but the force of the weight caused them to break apart. The rain fell fiercely upon the ground in heavy sections, beating against the roof as an intruder. Thunder and violent lightning soon followed, causing a magnificent display of natural fireworks.

She should have been at home.

Her thoughts raced madly through her mind, and she closed her eyes in frustration. Arriving only minutes before the storm's onslaught, she stood at the front door in a daze. Hesitating to knock she said aloud, "Go home, Anna. Please go home," but for some reason she couldn't will her body to move. She stood paralyzed and grimacing as the door slowly opened.

"I knew you would come," he said calmly. His smile made her feel sick, but she couldn't turn away. As he reached for her hand, she sighed weakly. When he pulled her closer to his body he put his arm around her waist and she pushed away.

"Let go of me, Hao," she was finally able to speak after she was inside the house.

He smiled at her for a few seconds then turned to walk away.

"Why are you here?" He asked calmly.

She opened her mouth to speak but was suddenly at a loss for words.

"I suppose that was a stupid question," he added without turning to face her, "I know why you're here."

"This is a mistake," she whispered.

"Are you afraid?" He turned around again and his smile had disappeared.

"I'm going home. I'm going home now," she knew the words came out, but he didn't seem to hear her.

"I said, are you afraid?"

She stood in front of him in silence. All of her senses seemed to malfunction in the seconds that followed. She didn't see him move. He was standing directly in front of her. She couldn't hear his voice. He whispered in her ear. She tried to slap him, but her arms wouldn't move. He ran his fingers through her hair. Finally, she was able to speak again.

"Yes," sounded more like a whimper.

"Why are you afraid?" His whisper sent chills down her spine.

Her inability to insult him was frustrating. He held her in a tight embrace as she spoke.

"I need to leave. Let go of me," she felt very weak and was angry at herself for allowing the emotion to show.

"You don't want to leave," he whispered calmly.

"Stop," she whispered.

"You wouldn't have come if you didn't want to be here."

He was right. She knew he was right, and the realization crippled her. Thoughts bounced around uncontrollably, disabling her ability to reason clearly. The loud thunder increased the tension further. She pulled away from him slightly, hoping she would see Yoh's face and it would shock her back to reality. She stared at him for what seemed like an eternity, but she couldn't see them. There was no warmth in his eyes, no traces of Yoh anywhere in his expression. The discovery baffled her. He blinked slowly and watched as she was lured closer to his face. The intensity of his gaze was hypnotic and unyielding, and she found herself unable to turn away.

"What are you looking for?" He asked calmly.

"Don't do this to me," she said softly, utterly regretting her words.

"What am I doing?" His tone didn't change.

"I'm leaving. Let me go!" She seemed pleased with the sternness of her voice, although tears were beginning to fill her eyes.

"I think you would have left already if you wanted to leave, or actually," he smiled, "You wouldn't be here at all."

She was momentarily unable to speak as if he had cast a spell on her.

"You're afraid because you think you're making a bad decision. But you have to understand that this isn't a decision at all. There is none to be made. This is the path and there is no other way. Yoh is irrelevant. The sooner you understand that the happier you'll be."

"I love him," she said finally.

"No you don't," he responded quickly.

"Stay away from me," she whispered fearfully.

Ignoring her plea he engulfed her in a long, passionate kiss that made her toes curl. Attempting to pull away, she found herself grabbing his back and pulling his hair with her hands. Her moans definitely didn't help the resistance, and her eyes began to roll back behind her eyelids when she felt the rhythm of his tongue. Within seconds every line of defense had fallen, and every inhibition dissipated. He had succeeded in winning her over and removing Yoh from her thoughts.


	2. Reality

**Reality**

Morning had erased every remnant of the night before. There were random puddles in the dirt, but the storm had passed as quickly as it appeared. The house was full of life and noisy. Tamao had been in the kitchen preparing breakfast, and everyone was gathered at the table to eat. It took a few moments for anyone to notice she was missing.

"Where's Anna?" Yoh asked after a few minutes.

"I haven't seen her this morning," Tamao replied.

"Maybe she overslept," Horo added calmly.

"Hmm," Yoh frowned.

"She never over sleeps," Ren said while leaving the table.

"Where are you going?" Yoh called to him.

He didn't answer and disappeared down the hall.

"She wasn't in her room last night," Pirika said after Ren was out of sight.

"What?" Yoh seemed surprised by her statement, "Well maybe she came down for a snack."

* * *

"Open the door," Ren said impatiently after several of his knocks went unanswered.

"Go away!" She sounded very irritated.

When he finally heard her voice, he felt slightly intimidated since he had never been near her room before. But, instead of obeying her request he opened the door quickly, stepped inside and closed it behind him. His frown quickly faded when he saw that she was curled into a tight ball on the floor.

"I told you to go away," she said weakly and without looking at him.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked softly and sat on the floor beside her.

"Are you deaf? I said go away," the broken tone in her voice didn't convince him to move.

"I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong. This isn't like you…" he started.

He noticed she was wrapped in a large brown blanket when she sat upright. She didn't speak again, but he knew after seeing the redness of her face and the puffiness of her eyes that she had been crying.

They sat in front of each other in silence for several minutes. He stared at her intently and she stared at the floor.

"Why can't you look at me?" He asked curiously.

"Nothing's wrong. I'm just tired," she said breathlessly.

"You didn't answer my question," he replied.

She blinked her eyes, glanced at him briefly, and darted them back to the floor. "Just go away."

"Is this about Yoh?" He asked, ignoring her demand.

She was suddenly defensive and he noticed the change in her body language. Her arms were tightly crossed over her bent knees and she sighed heavily.

"What are you talking about? This has nothing to do with Yoh. Why are we talking about him anyway?" She spoke very quickly and nervously.

"We're not," he wanted to say something else but she continued.

"I told you I was tired. I didn't tell you to come into my room in the first place. And now you can't seem to take a hint. Just leave me alone!" The tone in her voice was elevated, and as she neared the end of her rant she began to cry hysterically.

Ren was floored. He had never seen her cry before and had no idea how to handle the situation. "Anna," he had to stop. He wanted to comfort her somehow, but didn't know what to say. As he searched his brain to find a solution, he stopped short when he heard her speak.

"What have I done?" It was a whisper, but audible.

"What did you do?" He asked softly.

She closed her eyes and sighed when she realized he heard her, "I can't tell you," she said.

"Why not? It can't be that bad," he smiled, but she wasn't paying attention.

"Maybe it was a dream," although she wasn't talking to him, she spoke loud enough for him to hear her.

"Do you want me to get Yoh for you?" He asked suddenly.

"NO!!" He then noticed that bringing Yoh's name into the conversation was stressing her.

"If you need to talk about something I promise it won't leave this room. I'm very good at keeping secrets, and it's obvious that this is something you don't want Yoh to know about." He spoke softly and sat closer to her.

"I'm a good person," she said seemingly randomly.

He was surprised by the statement and said, "Yes, madam, you are."

"I'm a good person," she repeated as the tears flowed from her eyes like a fall.

"I…I won't tell anyone," he said softly and hesitantly.

* * *

"She wasn't downstairs," Horo said reluctantly, "I fell asleep watching TV last night and I didn't see anyone."

The four of them sat in silence for a few seconds. Yoh frowned slightly and began tapping the table with his fingers.

"Do you think something is wrong?" Tamao asked him anxiously.

"Nah. She's fine. I'm sure of it," his reply was nervous although his facial expression was calm.

"Do you think she's mad at you?" Pirika asked nervously.

Yoh stared at her but didn't speak.

"She can't still be mad at him," Horo said, "That would just be petty."

"I don't know," Yoh sighed.

"I hope nothing is wrong," Tamao said softly.

"What is Ren doing?" Horo said impatiently, "I'm hungry."

"Let's go ahead and eat before it gets cold," Yoh said.

Horo began eating first and Pirika followed his lead. Tamao waited a few more seconds before starting as if waiting for a cue. Yoh sat still with a frown and stared down the hallway.

* * *

"Say something," she whispered.

"I don't have anything to say," he mumbled angrily.

"Ren," she started.

"I can't even look at you," he said while standing.

"Please don't make me regret telling you this," she felt no need to defend herself so she ended her statement there.

"What were you thinking?!" He yelled at her suddenly, "He's the enemy, or have you forgotten that?"

"I," she tried to reply but he interrupted her.

"I don't know who you are anymore. What is wrong with you?" His hands were balled into tight fists as he paced back and forth in front of her.

"I wasn't thinking," she said blankly, "I made a mistake and it's over now."

"Are you that naïve?" He glared at her angrily, "This is just the beginning."

"I just told you," she started to speak again, but seemed too irritated to continue.

"You disgust me."

Although he spoke very calmly, she was deeply offended by his statement. She avoided his eyes and stared at the floor. He walked swiftly to the bedroom door, but before opening it he stopped abruptly.

"I won't tell him," he said weakly without turning around.

"Thank you," she sighed.


	3. Poison

**Poison**

"Anna, are you ready to leave?" Tamao asked.

She was standing in her bedroom looking out of the window in what appeared to be a trance. Tamao had completely entered her room without a reaction. Her long blond hair hid her facial expression and her body language was camouflaged by the white, sleeveless linen dress she was wearing.

"Um, Anna?" She called again.

Her words were met with total silence.

"Anna, is there something wrong?" Tamao walked closer until she was almost beside her. She was able to see Anna's eyes through the reflection in the window; her expression was blank. She rolled a few strands of her pink hair around one of her fingers and sighed nervously. The silence was very uncomfortable for her, and she didn't know how to proceed.

"Anna," she whispered suddenly.

"Yes?" She answered as if this had been the first time her name was called.

"I said, are you ready to leave?"

"Sure. Let's go," she turned around to face her and smiled.

"We don't have to go if you don't want to," Tamao said.

"No, shopping would be fun. I need to find a dress," she said warmly.

"Um, okay," Tamao said uneasily, "I'll go find Pirika."

When Tamao exited the room Anna's smile quickly faded and she faced the window again.

* * *

"So, what's wrong with Anna?" Horo asked suddenly. He was outside with Yoh and Ren sitting in the grass.

"I don't know," Yoh replied, scratching his head, "She hasn't really been talking to me much lately."

"You don't find that odd?" Horo seemed worried by Yoh's answer.

"Well, sure. I think it's very weird, but I don't really know what to do about it."

Ren stared at the grass and groaned.

"Maybe you should just ask her why she's ignoring you," Horo suggested.

"I know I should talk to her, but I'm avoiding it because I think she's upset with me," Yoh said sadly, "I mean the last conversation we had didn't go well."

"That's an understatement," Ren growled, "Generally speaking, when a woman asks if you love her, you should only say yes or no."

"I didn't know what to say. She caught me off guard," Yoh said in defense.

"It shouldn't have been something you had to prepare for," Ren barked angrily.

"Why are you mad?" Horo said finally.

"Because your friend here is an idiot!" Ren pointed at Yoh and stood abruptly.

"I know Ren. She's mad at me," Yoh sighed, "I need to go talk to her."

"We're leaving!" Pirika called to them suddenly.

Tamao and Anna appeared behind her, and the three began walking to the street.

"Wait, Anna!!" Yoh ran to her and they stopped.

"What is it, Yoh?" She asked him blankly.

"Can we talk?"

"If we have to," she said.

He led her back into the house and they sat at the table near the kitchen. The first few minutes were spent in silence until she finally spoke.

"You said you wanted to talk to me?" He couldn't read her mood.

"Are you mad at me?" He blurted.

"What?"

"I mean, you haven't said a word to me in almost a week. I'm sorry about our last conversation. I don't think it went well," he scratched his head nervously.

"It seemed fine to me," her thoughts were too preoccupied to recall the entire conversation fully and she felt anxious to leave.

"It's just that I care about you so much and," he started.

"But you don't love me. I get it," she interrupted, staring at the wall past him.

"No, that's not what I meant," he seemed unable to adequately express his feelings.

"You don't have to explain yourself. Our engagement wasn't our decision, remember?"

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"I wouldn't expect you to love me. And you shouldn't expect love from me either."

"What?" Her statements wounded him deeply and he stared at her as if he had been stabbed.

"So I think we're done here," she said as she stood and walked away, ignoring his disappointment.

"But…I do love you," he whispered, regretting his hesitation. He then watched helplessly as she reunited with the others.


	4. Curiosity

**Curiosity**

"I can't believe I bought so much stuff," Pirika said excitedly, "This is going to be difficult to explain to Horo."

Tamao and Pirika had two bags each that were filled with clothing and jewelry. Pirika was ecstatic to go shopping since she had never been able to, and had bothered them incessantly about it for weeks. Tamao was pleased with her purchase, but was troubled by Anna being obviously emotionally absent. She was walking in front of them and had been silent for most of the trip.

"Anna, do you like your dress?" Tamao asked anxiously.

"Yes. It's very nice," she said blankly.

"What did Yoh want to talk to you about?" Pirika asked.

"Nothing important," she sighed.

"Is everything okay?" Tamao asked.

"Sure," she replied blankly.

Anna's tone concerned her greatly, but she didn't know the right questions to ask. Pirika began rambling about a scarf she bought and seemed oblivious to the tension. Tamao wasn't listening to her and watched Anna as she continued walking in silence. Pirika dropped her bags and ran into Tamao when Anna stopped abruptly.

"What's wrong?" Tamao whispered.

"Hello, Anna," his voice startled them although it was very calm. Tamao searched the surroundings for a few seconds and found him leaning against a tree. He was wearing dark colored jeans and a burgundy front buttoned shirt. His long brown hair hid one of his eyes, and his expression was very calm, "I've been waiting for you."

"Hao," Pirika whispered. She was suddenly very afraid and stood behind Tamao.

"Go back to the house," Anna said sternly without turning around.

"That would be best," he added calmly.

Tamao stared at him for a few seconds as if trying to decipher his statement, "But Anna," she protested.

"I'll be fine. Just go," she insisted.

They hesitated for a few seconds then Pirika gathered her bags and began walking away quickly. Tamao glanced at Anna briefly then reluctantly followed. Anna watched them disappear down the path sighing heavily. She looked at him again and noticed he was smiling.

* * *

"And you left her there?!" Horo yelled.

"I was scared! She told us to leave!" Pirika cried nervously.

"Oh Anna," Tamao sighed.

"Should we go get her, Yoh?" Horo stood suddenly.

Yoh stared at the floor for a few seconds and sighed, "No, she can handle him. She should be fine," he said finally.

"What?" Ren asked angrily.

"He wouldn't hurt Anna. I'm the one he wants dead," he sighed.

"You're not the least bit curious about what's happening right now?" Horo asked.

"You should be," Ren mumbled.

"It doesn't matter. I trust her. She wouldn't help him. It would be useless for him to try that angle," Yoh said, crossing his arms.

"We should still go," Ren said, "We have to send him a message."

"If we did, Anna would just be mad at me for not trusting her. I can't afford for her to be mad at me for something else," he replied.

"Listen to me, Yoh. YOU NEED TO GO. She might be mad but she'll get over it," Ren pleaded.

"I agree with Ren, Yoh," Horo added.

"We shouldn't have left her," Tamao whispered.

"We don't have to tell her we were looking for her," Horo said, pacing back in forth, "We could just be out doing anything and...happen to run into them."

"Are you suggesting we spy?" Yoh seemed irritated now.

"No, I would refer to it as protecting your fiancé," Horo replied.

"I can wear the scarf I bought," Pirika whispered.

"I've never been a spy before," Tamao said cheerfully, "We could use code names."

"We're not spying on them," Yoh said sternly, "And anyway, you're assuming they're still together. She could be on her way back by now."

"Yoh, come on!" Horo protested.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," he replied angrily.

"I see now why you frustrate her so much," Ren said angrily.

Ignoring his comment, Yoh walked away from them and disappeared down the hallway. He wanted to be alone now, and needed to think about the situation. He was very nervous, but didn't want any of them to notice. Once he was inside his bedroom, he sat on his bed and sighed, "What are you doing, Anna?"

Ren stood against the wall with his arms crossed and stared at the floor angrily. Pirika stood next to him and watched him nervously. Tamao was sitting on the floor in front of them with her legs crossed and rested her chin on her hand. After a few minutes of silence, Horo stepped forward in front of them and clapped his hands together.

"So, are we going or what?" He asked anxiously.

"Yoh said we're not going, Horo," Tamao said sadly.

"He may not want to, but I want to know what's going on. Come on, don't you want to know?" He sat down beside her and nudged her in the shoulder.

Tamao stared at the floor and bit her bottom lip, "It's none of my business," she said.

"Maybe not, but you still want to know...don't you?" He asked while nudging her again.

"Um, I do," Pirika whispered.

"Let's go," Ren said quickly and began walking to the door.

Horo stood immediately and followed him outside.

"We're really going?" Pirika asked timidly.

"Come on!" Horo called back.

She ran after her brother worriedly, "I can't believe we're doing this," she said.

Tamao stood to follow them but stopped short when she noticed Yoh standing in the hallway. She stared at him for a few seconds and swallowed hard.

"Go," he said blankly.

"Um, okay," she said nervously, "Do you want come with us?"

"I...can't," he paused and sighed heavily.

"Why not?" She asked worriedly.

"Because...I don't know if I can handle being wrong about this."

His statement caught her off guard and she wasn't sure how to respond. After a few seconds of hesitation she nodded at him then ran to catch up with the others.


	5. Deception

**Deception**

_He sat in silence staring the floor. He didn't want her to tell him anything else. She had already divulged too much, and his stomach cramped violently from the nausea. There were details he just didn't want to know about, but she felt the need to be brutally honest. She knew he didn't want to hear any more, but she couldn't stop herself, as if this was a way she could atone for her mistake._

"_I couldn't think, like I was under his spell," she continued._

_He sighed._

"_I can't keep him out of my mind. He's always there. I can't stop it. I don't know why. I dream about him every night," she paused and sighed, "I shouldn't have been there, I know that. But...when he," she paused again._

_He wasn't looking at her._

"_I'll spare you any more details. Maybe I've said too much. Why am I telling him this?" She wasn't talking to him anymore, "It doesn't matter now. It's done. I'm not going back. I can't go back."_

_She watched him as his breathing elevated._

"_Ren?"_

_He didn't look at her._

"_Say something," she whispered._

"_I don't have anything to say," he mumbled angrily._

"Who are you talking to?" Horo asked him suddenly.

"Where did she go?" Pirika groaned, "I can't believe we can't find her."

Ren glanced around and noticed he was in the park sitting on the grass. Horo was sitting beside him and Pirika was pacing back and forth in front of them. Tamao was missing.

"We've been all over this town," she sighed.

"Are you okay, Ren? You look pale," Horo said softly.

"I'm fine," he said weakly, "Where's Tamao?"

"She can't be far ahead," he replied, "She wanted to keep looking."

"Let's find her and go back to the house," he said weakly.

"What? Come on, Ren. You wanted to find her too, didn't you?" Horo protested.

"It's been four hours," Pirika said.

"This is pointless," Ren said angrily.

"Fine," Horo groaned, "But she has some explaining to do when I see her."

* * *

She slowly opened the front door in an attempt to keep her entry secret. After stepping inside and closing it behind her she walked lightly to the hallway. Pausing briefly, she stared at the floor and smiled. When she began to giggle, she was suddenly startled by subtle movement across the room. Darting her eyes near the source of the sound, she noticed someone was sitting in a chair in the darkness.

"Where have you been?" He asked weakly.

"Yoh," she said calmly, "Why are you still awake?"

"It's two o'clock in the morning, Anna," he said, ignoring her question.

"Hmm," she replied.

He stood suddenly and took a few steps toward her, "You've been gone all day," he said, "Where did you go?"

She walked across the room in silence and turned on a table lamp. When she was able to see him she suddenly felt anxious. He was wearing black pajama pants and a wrinkled white t-shirt, as if he had been to bed and couldn't sleep. His eyes were fatigued and red, as if he hadn't slept in three days, and his hair fell over his neck and face. The obstruction didn't block her from noticing the desperation in his eyes. She glanced at the floor for a few seconds and looked at him again. At this point she noticed his eyes pierced through her as if he knew all of her thoughts. He had been staring at her since she entered the house and hadn't veered away from her face.

"I had errands," she hesitated and began staring at the wall behind him.

"Were you alone?" He asked. His facial expression and tone revealed his frustration.

She looked into his eyes again and frowned. Why did he ask her that? Was he trying to trap her? Anger began to spill over into her brain and canceled out the anxiety. The thought of him having the audacity to question her actions made her furious.

"What kind of a question is that?" She barked.

"Were you alone?" He repeated.

Pausing to swallow she said, "Yes."

She had no idea why she felt the need to lie to him. It was suddenly necessary. His eyes were sad, as if he already knew the truth and wanted her to say it. Her anger morphed into fear and guilt, and matching his stare was unbearable.

_She didn't even mention him. _The thought flooded his mind for a moment and he groaned.

"You were alone this entire time?" He asked, stepping closer. She noticed he seemed angry with her answer.

"What is this?!" She panicked suddenly.

He stared at her silently and blinked slowly. She knew he sensed her nervousness and the thought frustrated her.

"So you suddenly care?" She asked angrily.

Without speaking he approached her quickly and grabbed her waist, holding her close to his body and resting his head against her ear. She gasped and stared at the wall.

"Yoh?" She whimpered. What was he doing? Why was she unable to stay mad at him? Her frustration quickly evolved into sadness and doubt.

"I was worried," he said softly.

She stared at the floor and rested her hands on his shoulders, "There's nothing to worry about," she lied.

"Anna I..." He hesitated and paused, pulling her closer to his body and closing his eyes.

Tears quickly filled her eyes and she suddenly wanted to be away from him. She tried pushing his shoulders back but he only responded with more pressure.

"Let me go," she whispered under her breath.

He rubbed her back with his hands and seemed to ignore her request. He brushed her ear with his lips and she held her breath.

"If there was something wrong, you'd tell me...wouldn't you?" He whispered.

"I'm going to bed. It's late," she said quickly, pushing him hard against his chest. Finding herself unable to look at him because the tears were escaping her eyelids, she stormed down the hallway in silence.

He slumped forward from the force and balled his hands into fists. With his eyes closed, he exhaled and groaned.

"Anna..." he paused, "Please don't do this to me."


	6. Frailty

**Frailty**

"_How do you feel about me?" She said suddenly with a frown._

"_What do you mean?" He was obviously surprised by the question and became very nervous._

"_I mean, do you love me?"_

"_Uh...I uh...well," he stumbled over his words uncontrollably and watched as she stood abruptly._

"_Never mind," she said angrily._

"_Wait!" He said, grabbing her arm as she attempted to leave, "Ask me again."_

"_Are you serious?" She asked angrily._

"_It's just that I...I mean..I," for some reason he was unable to formulate an understandable sentence._

"_Good night, Yoh," she said angrily, jerking her arm away from him and storming out of the room._

The warm water fell over her body like a refreshing rainfall. She knew she had been in the shower too long, but the steam comforted her too much to care. Her hair was heavy now and strands were attached to her face. She didn't push them away in her usual fashion and stood under the water in silence. The water tuned out all outside noises and allowed her to concentrate on her thoughts. Yoh had never hugged her before, and she was bothered by the entire exchange. The more she thought about him the angrier she became, but for some reason, the anger would subside into remorse. She rubbed her face with her hands vigorously and turned off the water.

She emerged from her bedroom wearing the sleeveless navy dress she bought at the store. The dress was very comfortable, and she was relieved it fit her well. Her hair was still wet when she walked down the hallway and into the living room. The house was completely quiet, with the exception of Tamao standing near the kitchen.

"Where are they?" She asked.

"They went running," Tamao replied, "Pirika went to time them."

"Hmm," she sat at the table and rested her hands on the wood. Tamao sat down beside her and watched her eyes as she spoke.

"Is there something wrong, Anna?"

"No," she responded quickly.

"Do you remember when we went shopping a couple of weeks ago?" She was suddenly very nervous and began tapping her fingers against the table.

"Yes," she said dryly.

"What happened when I left? What did he say to you?"

"Nothing really," she said. Tamao noticed she was irritating her but she continued.

"It's just that Yoh has been...upset lately," she paused and bit her bottom lip, "Because he knew you were with him and he was..."

"What?" She interrupted her suddenly.

"What?" Tamao responded.

"Who told him that?" She said angrily, "Did you tell him that?"

"Well, no I...but...we were worried. He scares me, Anna. I didn't know what else to do," Tamao stumbled over her words fearfully as if she expected Anna to slap her.

Anna stared at the table angrily and closed her eyes. She remembered the last time she and Yoh spoke; the night he waited up for her. He hadn't mentioned Hao at all, and she suddenly felt overwhelming anxiety. Perhaps this was why he was making it easy for her to ignore him. They've only exchanged strange looks since this day, and he always seemed...sad.

"I have to get out of here," she said suddenly, standing from her seat.

"What? Where are you going?" Tamao asked, standing with her.

"I'll be back later," she said as she walked swiftly to the front door and slammed it behind her.

She walked in the woods quickly without a specific destination, for she needed fresh air to keep her from suffocating. Thoughts of Yoh's demeanor on that day bothered her more now than before, and her mind raced madly with regret. As much as he frustrated her, she was angry at herself for making him sad. The wind blew carelessly through her hair and around her dress, causing a cool sensation on her scalp. She remembered her hair was slightly damp and suddenly worried about catching a cold. As the jumbled thoughts oscillated in and out of focus, she almost stumbled to the ground when noticing she was standing at Hao's front door.

"What?" She said aloud. How did she get here? The door opened before she had a chance to escape.

He stood in the doorway staring at her in silence. He was wearing over sized black linen pants and most of his hair was pulled back with a rubber band. A few stray strands of his long brown hair fell in his face, but he seemed unaffected by them. He stood aside in order to allow her to come in. She sighed angrily and walked past him quickly, attempting to ignore the fact that he wasn't wearing a shirt. He closed the door behind her and watched calmly as she began pacing back and forth in the room.

The pacing stopped suddenly and she stood with her back facing him. _What am I doing here? _She thought to herself. _What is wrong with me?_

"There's nothing wrong with you," he said, breaking her concentration.

When she heard him speak she closed her eyes and sighed heavily. She remembered now why she was unable to escape him in her thoughts. He could read them. She paused and stared at the floor. He remained silent and watched her when she spun around to face him.

"I came here for one reason," she started, "I'm not coming back."

He stared at her calmly and remained silent.

"I'm getting married," she continued, "I'm marrying him. Yoh is..." she hesitated suddenly when he took a few steps closer.

"He loves me. He hasn't said it yet, but he does. I know he does. He's kind and gentle, and you're not," she saw he was coming closer and she took a few steps back.

"He...he makes me feel safe. You don't make me feel safe," her voice began to falter as he continued to step closer, "You make me feel..." she was interrupted suddenly when her back hit the wall behind her.

She panicked when she realized she had nowhere else to move, and he was standing directly in front of her face. He remained silent and the intensity of his gaze bothered her.

"Are you listening to me?" She said angrily.

"Yes," he said calmly, "But your thoughts are louder."

"He doesn't make me feel like this," she whispered.

He paused for a few moments and blinked slowly, "Why do you feel weak, Anna?"

"Stop it!" She yelled, pushing him back and stepping away from the wall, "I don't love you. I don't even like you."

He continued to stare as if ignoring her.

"I want you to leave me alone. I don't want to run into you, and I don't want to see you!" She paused to take a few breaths.

"You didn't answer my question," he said, dismissing all of her words and stepping closer.

"I want Yoh!!" She screamed. "Do you get that?! I want him, not you!"

He suddenly grabbed her arm and slammed her roughly against the wall. She gasped and stared at him fearfully.

"Do you refuse to answer me because you think I already know why?" He asked calmly.

"Don't," she whispered.

"I wouldn't do anything you don't want me to do," he said softly.

She knew what was coming and her breathing elevated. He barely brushed his lips against her mouth and she closed her eyes. Lingering for a few moments, he pulled away and took a few steps back without kissing her. She slumped forward and gasped for air, holding her hand over her chest. He watched her briefly before he spoke again.

"If you want to leave I won't make you stay," he said. His tone hadn't changed since the beginning, so she was unsure of his demeanor.

"What?" She whispered. They stared at each other for several seconds in silence.

"You said you wanted to leave," he said finally.

"I..." she was suddenly at a loss for words.

"You're still here," he said blankly.

Her hands trembled and she couldn't control the quivering of her lips. She was suddenly paralyzed and stared at him as if he had stolen her voice.

"Are you paying attention now?" He asked.

She frowned at him suddenly, "What are you talking about?" She was finally able to say.

"Are you listening to your thoughts?" He paraphrased.

"I can't," she whispered, staring at the floor.

"You can't understand your thoughts? Or is it that you can't leave?" He asked, stepping in front of her again.

"I...need to leave," she said without looking at him.

"But you don't want to," he whispered.

He wrapped his arms around her waist, causing her to arch her back from against the wall. She didn't want to look at him, but had no intention of freeing herself from his embrace. She balled her hands into fists and hit him hard in the chest.

"I hate you," she whimpered.

He smiled and kissed her roughly, pinning her body hard against the wall again. She returned his affection vigorously, as if she had been starving for too long and dug her fingernails into his back. She could no longer remember why she was there in the first place, and the only thought she could conjure was that she had been waiting all day for an excuse to be there.


	7. Sympathy

**Sympathy**

She moaned gently before opening her eyes and stretching her arms. There was no way of knowing how long she had been asleep, but some of her memories came to her quickly when she noticed he was staring at her.

"Welcome back," he said softly. He was lying next to her with his elbow holding up his head and his hand rested under his cheek. The rubber band was missing and his hair fell all over his back and neck.

She glanced at him briefly, and the disappointment in her eyes was obvious. Her reaction irritated him, but his smile didn't reveal any emotion.

"You were expecting someone else?" He asked.

"What time is it?" She asked, ignoring his question.

"You've been asleep for a few hours," he said calmly.

She sighed heavily and stared at the ceiling.

"Why do you think about him so much?" He asked abruptly.

"I don't," she said breathlessly. She then groaned from a sudden pain in her back. Looking around the room again, she noticed they were lying on the floor. She was wearing the dress she came in, but couldn't seem to remember how they ended up there.

"Why are you nervous?" His questions seemed random, but she was sure he was probing her jumbled thoughts.

"I have to leave," she attempted to sit upright, but he wrapped his arms around her torso to restrain her.

"Why haven't you told him?" He asked, "Are you waiting for something?"

His embrace frustrated her greatly, and she tried rolling over to free herself, "Stop," she said angrily.

"What are you waiting for?" He asked again, ignoring her resistance.

"Why is this happening?" She whispered, falling onto her back and staring helplessly at the ceiling.

He watched quietly as she closed her eyes.

"Why am I here again? I'm sick of feeling so..." she paused, "Why do you make me feel like this? Why are you doing this to me?"

"You're not weak, Anna," he said calmly.

"You're the only one who makes me feel like this. You always make me second guess myself," she continued, ignoring him, "I have to leave. I can't come back here," her eyes filled with tears suddenly and she began hitting his arms with her fist to force him to release her.

He didn't respond but held her tighter, increasing her frustration.

"Let go of me," she said angrily.

"It's not weakness, Anna," he said softly, "you love me."

She stopped squirming suddenly and stared at him, "What?"

"You said you love me," he said calmly.

"I have NEVER said that," she growled.

"I heard you say it," he insisted, "right before you fell asleep."

Was he trying to trick her? She frowned at him briefly and stared at the ceiling again. There was no way she could ever love him; she was sure of it. But, he said he heard her say those words. Her jumbled thoughts suddenly triggered a headache and she closed her eyes.

"I don't love you," she said heatedly.

"Is that such a bad thing?" He asked, ignoring her contempt.

"I don't love you, Hao," she repeated, raising her voice slightly.

"You think too much," he said blankly, as if she hadn't spoken. She groaned when he moved her hair away from her face with his fingers and kissed her neck.

"You don't listen to me," she sighed.

"I always listen to you, Anna," he replied, "but you never listen to yourself."

"What are you talking about?"

"There's a simple solution," he said calmly as he ran his fingers down the side of her arm.

"And what is that?" She asked sarcastically.

"Marry me."

* * *

Tamao prepared a large lunch for the others when they returned from their run. Pirika joined her in the kitchen and bragged about how fast her brother was compared to Ren and Yoh. She searched for an apron so that she wouldn't stain the white collared t-shirt and blue denim skirt she was wearing and Tamao leaned against the kitchen counter with her arms crossed staring at the floor.

"What's wrong?" Pirika asked suddenly.

"I'm worried about Anna," she replied.

"Have you talked to her today?"

"Yeah, but it was a very short conversation," Tamao said sadly.

"Where is she now?" Pirika whispered. She didn't want Yoh to hear her.

"She didn't say where she was going," Tamao sighed. She wanted to elaborate, but Horo entered the kitchen and broke her concentration.

"Okay, I'm ready to eat now. Pirika said I had to take a shower," he said while scratching his stomach.

"That's because all of you were stinking up the house," Pirika retorted.

"It's mostly done, Horo," Tamao said, smiling weakly.

"Great! I'll help you take it to the table," he said happily.

"Thank you, brother," Pirika said, smiling at him.

Yoh and Ren had been sitting at the table for a few minutes talking about how slow Yoh's time was. He was obviously distracted during their run, but didn't want to tell Ren he hadn't been sleeping well for two weeks. Ren saw that Horo was bringing food out from the kitchen and stood to help, but Yoh grabbed his arm suddenly.

"Ren," he said, "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"We've been talking since we got back," he replied.

"I mean alone. Let's go to my room," Yoh didn't look at him when he stood and walked slowly down the hallway.

Ren hesitated and stood still for a few seconds. He was suddenly uneasy about talking to Yoh in private and dreaded finding out what the topic was going to be. _Please don't ask me about Anna,_ He thought to himself as he slowly left the table.

"Hey, where are you guys going? Lunch is ready!" Horo yelled.

"You don't have to wait for us," he called to him.

"Why doesn't Yoh ever want to talk to me?" Horo complained when Tamao and Pirika entered the room, "I give great advice."

Ren purposely delayed reaching Yoh's bedroom door and even stood in front of it for several seconds before opening it. Quietly stepping inside he noticed Yoh was pacing back and forth with his hands deep in the pockets of his orange linen pants. His hair covered his expression as he stared at the floor, and he didn't seem to notice Ren's entrance.

"What is it?" Ren asked him finally.

He stopped pacing and resumed his eye contact with the floor. Silence quickly filled the room, adding to Ren's discomfort.

"Yoh, I said..." he started again.

"I heard you," Yoh responded blankly.

Ren folded his arms across his chest and exhaled waiting for Yoh to speak. He had no idea why he felt the need to be defensive, but he assumed this conversation was about Anna and he didn't want to answer any uncomfortable questions.

"This is my fault," he whispered abruptly.

"What?" Ren was confused by his statement and frowned at him.

"If I hadn't been so..." he paused for the right word to come to him, "stupid," and he couldn't find one, "she would be here. You know why she's always gone now, right?"

Ren froze and stared at him nervously.

"It's because she hates me. She doesn't want to be around me. She'd rather stay away from the house until I go to bed than talk to me," He didn't seem to be talking to Ren, but he was speaking loud enough for him to hear. His back was facing him now and he paused and sighed.

"This isn't your fault, Yoh," Ren said weakly. He didn't know what else to say.

"I should have told her how I feel. I shouldn't have been such a coward. And now...I'm losing her," he said sadly.

Ren was furious. His conversation with Anna flooded his mind rapidly and he sighed heavily. Clenching his teeth he groaned, "You didn't do anything wrong," he said angrily.

"Yes I did," he said, "I pushed her away."

"Don't say that!" He yelled at him and Yoh spun around to face him in shock. "You made a mistake, but that's no excuse for her to betray you! She should be apologizing to you! I can't believe she's this selfish! She had no reason to go out and..." He stopped suddenly and stared at him.

"What are you talking about, Ren?" Yoh asked fearfully, taking a few steps closer in front of him.

Ren closed his eyes and bit his bottom lip. He knew he said too much, and Yoh was staring at him as if waiting for a punch in the face. When he opened his eyes he stared at the floor, finding himself unable to look at him.

"Are you talking about the incident with Hao?" Yoh whispered. He didn't have the courage to ask the question he really wanted answered.

He didn't respond and continued staring at the floor.

"She said she was alone and had to run errands," Yoh said. Ren knew that even he didn't believe his words, and his voice trembled as he spoke.

"Yoh," he sighed. He didn't want to tell him what he knew. Telling him about Anna would break his heart, and he didn't want to be the one responsible for delivering the blow.

"It was probably a coincidence," Yoh said weakly, "that they ran into him. People pass that way every day."

Ren glanced at him briefly, but couldn't hold his gaze when he saw that his eyes were filling quickly with tears. He immediately regretted knowing anything about the situation and wanted to leave. Tapping his foot nervously on the floor he sighed.

"We don't have to talk about this now, our food is getting cold," he stalled.

Yoh didn't speak, but his eyes burned through Ren's chest like he knew all of his secrets. He didn't bother to wipe the tears that rolled slowly down his cheeks and landed quietly onto his brown t shirt. He closed his eyes for a few seconds then opened them slowly.

"Yoh, you should eat something," Ren's voice quivered nervously as he spoke.

"She was lying to me, wasn't she?" He asked solemnly, ignoring his statement.

Ren paused, staring at him sadly and his bottom lip trembled uncontrollably. Seeing Yoh cry was proven to be more painful than the discomfort he felt when he witnessed Anna doing it. Yoh was his friend, probably his best friend, yet he felt the need to protect the person who was hurting him. Where was his loyalty? The guilt now overwhelmed him, and the priorities in his mind reassembled into place. He sighed softly and clenched his teeth briefly before he spoke.

"There's something you need to know," he said reluctantly.


	8. Impulse

**Impulse**

"Excuse me?" She asked weakly, quickly sitting upright to stare at him.

"I want you to marry me," he said again calmly.

She held her breath for a few seconds before speaking again, "Are you serious?"

He sat behind her, pulling her back against his chest, and wrapped his arms around her. She didn't push him away, but stared into her lap in shock.

"Why are you so surprised?" He whispered.

"Are you serious?" She repeated, except this time it sounded like a frightened whisper.

"I want you to be my wife," he said calmly.

"Why?" She blurted.

"I would give you the world and everything in it if you asked for it," he whispered, ignoring her question.

"No you wouldn't," she sighed.

"I can give you anything and everything you want," he continued.

"I can't be bought," she groaned.

"I'm not talking about material possessions, Anna," he replied.

She rested her head on his neck and exhaled.

"You're holding on to Yoh because of obligation. That's not love," he said softly.

"He loves me," she said weakly.

"I love you," he said quickly.

He was confusing her. This was the first time he'd ever said such a thing, and she was bothered by his sudden sensitivity. She was obviously caught off guard by his statement, but refused to appear affected.

"You don't love me," she said sadly, "you just want to win."

"This is not a game," he whispered.

Something about this statement sent chills down her spine, and she shivered from the sensation. He pulled her hair away from her neck and kissed her gently. She shifted to look into his eyes and sat on his lap, and for the first time in weeks her thoughts were quiet.

"Have I ever lied to you?" He asked.

"No," she said softly.

He kissed her lips briefly and stared into her eyes as if attempting hypnosis. She smiled at him finally and wrapped her arms around his neck. She returned his kiss aggressively, pushing him back forcefully. He allowed himself to fall on the floor again but stopped her when she climbed on top of him. She sighed and sat next to him.

"Let's end this nonsense," he said calmly.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"You should put him out of his misery."

* * *

Pirika and Tamao roamed the large hallway for a few minutes while Ren and Horo waited at the front desk. The burgundy carpet was well maintained and felt as soft as pillows under their feet. The walls appeared to be painted in gold, and all of the staff that passed them gave them warm smiles and waves. Tamao felt somewhat underdressed with her pale pink t-shirt and black pants, but dismissed the notion after watching Pirika's excitement.

"This is beautiful," she sighed.

"It's better than beautiful, it's gorgeous!" Pirika added cheerfully.

"It's too expensive," Tamao said worriedly.

"Ren said it was no problem, Tamao. We wouldn't be here if he couldn't afford it," Pirika reassured her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"I guess you're right," she said softly.

"Hey, the rooms are ready!" Horo called to them.

"I can't believe I'm staying in a hotel," Tamao whispered as they approached the counter to meet them.

"Where are our bags?" Pirika asked as she glanced around them.

"They've already taken them upstairs," Ren replied blankly.

"Well let's go! I want to see my room!!" Horo said excitedly.

Horo and Pirika rushed down the hallway to the elevators talking eagerly about the rooms. Ren and Tamao walked slowly behind them in silence. Tamao stared at the floor as they walked, glancing in front of her occasionally to keep from stumbling. Ren noticed her uneasiness but didn't want to say anything.

"Why are we here, Ren?" She asked, interrupting their silent walk.

"Yoh asked me to leave the house for a while," he said blankly.

She paused and bit her bottom lip, "He wants to spend time with Anna?"

"You could say that," he replied, unwilling to elaborate.

"He wanted all of us to leave?" She asked.

"He wanted to be alone with her," he said, "I told him we'd stay away for a few days."

Tamao didn't respond and remained silent on the elevator ride. Horo began pushing various buttons, causing the elevator to stop on every floor. Pirika slapped his hand and scolded him for making the ride longer and Ren laughed at them quietly. Tamao stared at him sadly, causing his smile to quickly fade, and he stared at his feet.

"What floor are we on, Ren?" Pirika asked in an irritated tone.

"Seventeen," he replied.

"Oh good grief!" She growled, punching Horo hard in the arm.

"Ouch!" He protested, "We're almost there. Calm down."

Ren opened the door when they reached the correct floor and Horo ran inside with Pirika close behind. He stopped short and stared around the room in awe.

"THIS IS AMAZING!!" Pirika yelled excitedly.

"Wow," Tamao said softly once she was inside.

"There are two rooms;" Ren said calmly, "The other one is next door."

"Where are we going to sleep?" Tamao asked timidly.

"Well, Ren and I can sleep here and you and Horo can sleep in the other room," Pirika suggested.

Tamao gasped and stared at her wide eyed.

"That's fine with me," Ren replied.

"Nice try," Horo said as he sat on the edge of the bed, "You're not sleeping with Ren."

"Horo," Pirika started but was interrupted.

"You and I will take the other room. Tamao and Ren can sleep in here," he said, seemingly satisfied with his suggestion.

Tamao stared at him and swallowed hard, "There's one bed in here," she whispered.

"Horo and I can sleep in the other room," Ren sighed, "You and Pirika can stay here. Would that be comfortable for you?"

Pirika darted her eyes at him quickly and frowned.

"I don't want to sleep with you," Horo mumbled.

"You won't be. You'll be sleeping on the sofa," he added.

"That's fine, Ren," Tamao smiled.

"How about I sleep on the bed and you sleep on the balcony?" Horo asked sarcastically.

"I want to see the other room," Tamao said as she walked to the door.

"Yeah, I'm going to make my claim," Horo said, rolling his eyes at him while following her into the hallway.

As soon as they exited, Pirika punched Ren hard in the shoulder. He took a step back and sighed.

"What are you doing?!" She groaned.

"I'm trying not to make your brother uncomfortable," he said.

"I don't care about his comfort level! This was a perfect opportunity to be alone and you blew it," she said, folding her arms across her chest.

"You make it sound like..." he hesitated.

"Like what?" She demanded.

"Never mind," he sighed, "What did you talk to Tamao about?"

"I didn't tell her about Anna; she would have gone straight to Yoh," she said quickly.

"It doesn't matter anyway," he said, "I already told him."

"He already knew when we left the house?" Pirika asked worriedly.

"Yeah."

"But," she paused, "he was so...quiet."

"You should have seen him when we talked," he said sadly.

"Well, I hope they work this out," she said, "The house has been way too uncomfortable since they haven't been talking. I wish she would just stop already."

"I don't think this will be an easy fix," he sighed, "He's...broken."

* * *

The house was unusually quiet when she returned in the middle of the night. It had become a habit for her to stay out until everyone was asleep so that she didn't have to answer any unwanted questions. The normal feelings of guilt and remorse, however, were replaced with comfort and confidence. In the weeks before, she convinced herself of her eventual insanity, regurgitating a vicious cycle of masochistic lust, but this night felt different. He told her he loved her, and even wanted to marry her. She still wasn't sure of his motives or if she even believed him, but somehow hearing him say those words were comforting to her. After all, she had longed for Yoh to admit something along the lines of love at least, but he seemed incapable of satisfying her. Maybe Hao was right. Maybe she waited for him out of obligation and wanted to marry him because it was the "right thing to do". Maybe she convinced herself that he loved her because in her mind it was the only thing that made sense.

She undressed quickly and stepped into the shower, deliberately turning the water temperature as hot as she could stand it. The steam developed quickly and warmed her body from the inside out. The water fell over her head and soothed her mind, easing the thoughts that were beginning to consume her. She drifted off into a trance momentarily, but a single thought brought her back.

_Does he really love me?_ The thought made her stomach hurt suddenly and she folded her arms over her chest. He had always been cold when talking to her, so his kind words confused her greatly. She now wondered if he was trying to trick her in some way, as if he was toying with her mind somehow like a pawn. As much as she wanted to believe his words were genuine, she couldn't help the feeling she was being used.

"Why do you care anyway?" She said aloud.

That was the problem. She cared. No matter how many times she felt horrible for going back, she never had the will to stop. This was why she was so angry at herself. It now made sense. She didn't hate him because he was aggressive and violent. She didn't loathe him because he always reminded her he was in control. There was no way she could resent him for overpowering her and forcing her into submission. He was the opposite of Yoh in every way, and she loved him for it.

After her shower, she stood in the bathroom in front of the mirror. It was still foggy, but she was able to make out the blond outline of her hair and a distorted image of her face. She exhaled deeply and pulled her hair behind her ears then began drying the water from her body carefully with a towel. She grew more nervous the drier she became. Eventually she would have to talk to Yoh, and she still worried whether or not she was making a good decision. She covered her naked body with a large robe and walked slowly to her bedroom. The hallway was completely dark with the exception of the moonlight from various windows in the house.

_What if I'm wrong?_ The thought halted her trek and she stared at the floor. She tried to convince herself to let it go, but the curiosity consumed her now.

"I need to go to bed," she whispered as she opened her bedroom door. When she closed it and took a few steps closer to her bed she gasped when she noticed she wasn't alone.

There was a dim lamp in the corner, and its light revealed much of his face and outlined his body as he stood in front of her. His facial expression wasn't completely clear, but she could see his brown eyes burning through her.

"Yoh," she said uneasily, "...what are you doing here?"

He didn't respond and took a few steps closer.


	9. Fallacy

**Fallacy**

"What are you doing here, Yoh?" She repeated angrily.

He was a few feet in front of her now and completely silent. His arms dangled lifelessly at his sides, and she couldn't tell if he blinked at all since she discovered him. When her eyes adjusted to the new lighting, she noticed he was wearing what appeared to be beige linen pants and a loose white t-shirt. He didn't look like he'd been to bed, and there were dark circles around his eyes as if he had become a victim of severe insomnia. The silence bothered her and she suddenly felt very anxious.

"Get out," she said.

"I wasn't going to marry you because I had to," he whispered as if he had no strength to project his voice.

"What?" She said uneasily.

"I was going to marry you because I wanted to."

His words made her angry and she groaned. As she began pacing back and forth in front of him she crossed her arms.

"I don't care if you want to marry me," she spat, "I'm sick of you. I don't want to be your 'trainer' anymore. I'm not a roommate...or a baby sitter!"

"Anna," he tried to interrupt, but she continued in an elevated tone.

"I want someone who loves me and doesn't need me to take care of him. Someone who has the backbone to be successful without me. I don't want to marry...a child!"

He was obviously saddened by her words, but she couldn't stop herself from spitting out vicious insults whether she believed them or not.

"I asked you a simple question, and you couldn't even give me a straight answer. How do you think that makes me feel? I'll tell you. I feel like I'm wasting my time. I feel like you're afraid of me. I don't want someone who's afraid of me, Yoh."

"I'm not afraid of you," he said weakly.

Her outburst reached an emotional point too frustrated to hear him, "I want someone who can stand up to me. Who can tie their shoelaces without me and can go to bed without being tucked in at night. I want to marry a man, not a baby!"

She was breathing rapidly when she stopped screaming at him and quickly regretted all of her words. Finding herself unable to look at him, she walked behind him and faced the wall.

"I didn't mean that," she said quickly.

"Why Hao?" He said, ignoring her.

"What?" She whispered, surprised his name was mentioned.

"Out of all the people in this town...why...him?" He clenched his teeth and groaned.

"He told you," she mumbled under her breath and closed her eyes briefly. She felt a small sense of relief that Ren was unable to keep her secret. It gave her less work, but she couldn't answer his question. She couldn't tell him that she was intrigued at first because he was his twin. He vaguely reminded her of Yoh without all of the irritating character flaws, and had pursued her relentlessly for months unsuccessfully. But as time progressed, Yoh disappeared, increasing her affinity for his brother. She realized over time he was very different from Yoh, so different she eventually saw him as an escape. There was no way to tell him that what she first thought of as a mistake snowballed into a habit and stumbled into an addiction. He wouldn't understand.

He turned around to face her and she kicked the wall softly with her foot.

"I don't want to talk to you right now," she said without looking at him.

"Do you love him?" He asked weakly.

"I said I don't want to talk to you," she growled.

"You don't, do you?"

She spun around angrily to yell at him but stopped abruptly when she looked into his eyes. There was no way she could be mean to him while locked in his gaze. His hypnotic eyes always succeeded in making her feel guilty when she had every right to be angry with him. It was a weakness she was never able to fix, and her demeanor quickly changed.

"I know you don't love him," he sad sadly while taking a few steps closer.

"You don't care anyway," she sighed, resting her back against the wall.

"I wanted you to be my wife. I wanted for us to have children and to grow old together," his voice trembled as he spoke, and he balled his hands into fists to keep them from shaking.

"Yoh," she whispered as her eyes quickly filled with tears.

"I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I wanted...to make you happy," he closed his eyes briefly then stepped closer, "I can. I can make you happy."

"Stop," she whimpered.

"He can't make you happy, Anna. He doesn't love you. He...can't love you. Not like I do."

"Don't."

"I need you."

"Shut up!" She screamed, slapping him hard across the face.

He stumbled but recovered quickly, clenching his teeth from the stinging.

"I want you out of here now," she whimpered as she pushed him weakly in the chest. He didn't move and allowed her to hit him a few times before collapsing in his arms.

The anger boiled inside her violently as she stood in silence. Why was she hugging him? Her thoughts were too cluttered to figure out what to do. She was supposed to be angry with him. This conversation was supposed to be about her leaving him. But he was holding her in his arms, kissing her forehead, and she didn't want him to let her go.

"I'm sorry I pushed you away," he whispered, "I love you, and I don't want to lose you."

She couldn't hold back her tears anymore and buried her face in his shirt. He held her tighter and closed his eyes.

"You broke my heart, Anna," he whimpered, "You're the only one who can fix it."

She pulled back and stared at him for a few seconds breathing heavily. What was she doing? Her thoughts made no sense anymore, and his eyes filled her with anguish and despair. She pulled his shirt with her hands, allowing herself to cry freely.

"I'm sorry," She sniffed, "I'm so sorry, Yoh."

He hugged her again and stumbled as her legs gave out. Breaking her fall while holding out his hand against the wall, he sat on the floor. She sat in his lap and rested her head on his shoulder. There was no way she could talk to him now; her tears were choking her. She swallowed hard and stared at the window on the adjacent wall.

"I can't live without you," he said softly, staring at the floor, "Please don't leave me."

Anna had no idea why he was able to evoke such emotion out of her. She blinked her eyes slowly and sighed. Without thinking, she kissed his lips gently, but quickly pulled away.

"This can't be fixed," she said sadly, "I can't..."

He returned her kiss suddenly, interrupting her statement and disturbing her thoughts. This was the first time Yoh ever kissed her, and she found herself unable to think about anything else except the comfort of his lips. The exchange was slow and gentle, soothing her sadness and luring her into a joyful state of peace. Some of the pieces in her jumbled mind fell into place as a completely different puzzle. He made her feel warm and safe. All of their problems and mistakes seemed to melt away in the seconds that followed. She held the back of his neck with her hand and deepened his kiss, aggressively invading his mouth with her tongue. He moaned from her progression and held her tighter, allowing her to take control over him. Her body suddenly felt cold when she realized her robe was open, but she didn't bother to close it, wrapping her arms around his neck and running her fingers through his hair.

They were nearing the point of no return and couldn't seem to stop. She didn't realize his shirt was now missing, and the room began to spin around them. Thoughts of happiness consumed her now. Maybe this was fixable. Maybe she was right about Yoh loving her and shouldn't have doubted it. She thought about how much easier life would be if they stayed together. Thoughts of spending her life with him flashed into her memory. Feeling the warmth of his skin against hers overwhelmed her and she moaned. Her thoughts flooded her mind at an alarming rate until one completely obliterated the rest.

_Hao._

She pulled away from him as if awakening from a bad dream and stood abruptly, pulling the robe tightly and securing the belt around her waist. He stared at her stunned for a few seconds before following her.

"I want you to leave," she said sadly without looking at him.

"I can't," he replied softly.

"Please get out," there was no way she could hide her tears from him; he could hear the weakness in her voice.

"I'm not leaving," he said as he attempted to wrap his arms around her.

"Get away from me!" She yelled at him, escaping his grasp, "I don't want you here!"

"I'm not leaving," he repeated, "I don't want to."

"I can't give you what you want," she sighed, "I can't be the person you want me to be."

He was confused by her statement but didn't move.

"Why are you still here?" She groaned as she quickly wiped her tears with the sleeve of her robe, "Go away!"

"You don't want to be with him," he said angrily, "You don't love him. I won't accept that."

"You have no idea what I want," she swallowed hard before she could continue, "You'll never understand."

"I understand you more than you think, Anna," he said calmly, brushing her hair away from her face with his fingers, "That's why you're upset. You know I'm right; and you hate being wrong."

"Was that supposed to be romantic?" She asked sarcastically.

"No, it was just honesty," he replied, "I've never lied to you, Anna. I don't plan to start now. When I say I love you, I mean it. I didn't say it to keep you here. I said it because that's how I feel. You are the only one in my heart, and if you leave you'll take it with you. I know he doesn't love you. He can't love you the way I do. He wouldn't sacrifice anything for you. He wouldn't die for you."

"You would die for me?" She whispered, as if she didn't hear anything else.

"I would do anything for you," he said sadly.

There was never a time in her life where she felt this confused. Indecisiveness infuriated her. She was now angry because she allowed him to put more doubt in her mind about Hao. Before she ran into him she was ready to leave, ready to move on with her life. But now he was threatening her happiness, peace of mind and sanity.

"There is something I want you to do for me, Yoh," she said weakly.

"What is it?" He asked eagerly.

"Let me go."

He stared at her for a few seconds in shock as if she drove a dagger deep into his heart and twisted it so it couldn't be removed.

"Can you do that for me?" She asked softly as tears slowly ran down her cheeks.

"No!" He blurted as if it were an involuntary, painful response.

"Yoh," she sighed but stared at him without continuing her sentence.

He grabbed her suddenly and kissed her lips as if he didn't hear any of her words. There was no way he would accept it. To his surprise she didn't push him away or even resist his passionate assault. He could feel himself slowly losing control and growing more aggressive than normal, but she didn't stop him. He slammed her back against the wall as if angry, but she didn't protest, even allowing him to kiss her again and restrain her wrists. As much as her actions confused him, he didn't care enough to stop himself. He just wanted to be there. He wanted her to love him, and he had to keep her from leaving.


	10. Futility

**Futility**

Pirika awoke suddenly from the rumbling noises in the darkness. The sun hadn't arrived yet, so she knew her awakening was too early. As the noises became louder she reached over the bed table to turn on the lamp. Tamao was at the foot of the bed fully dressed and stared at her in shock once the room was illuminated.

"Pirika!" She whispered nervously.

"What are you doing?" Pirika rubbed her eyes briefly and watched as Tamao paced nervously in front of her.

"I have to leave," she answered without looking at her and folding her arms across her chest.

"What? What time is it?" She asked sleepily, searching the room for a clock.

"I can't stay here. I need to leave," Tamao repeated, ignoring her.

"It's almost three am," Pirika groaned when she found it.

"He needs me. I have to leave," she replied again.

"...Yoh?"

"Please, don't tell Ren, okay?" She pleaded, "He won't understand."

"Tamao, I don't think this is a good idea," Pirika replied as her sleepiness wore off.

"I have to help him. I can't stay here and do nothing!"

"Please don't do this. He wants to be alone...with Anna," Pirika stared at her nervously, knowing her words were useless.

"I'm leaving," she said abruptly, almost interrupting her, "Please don't follow me."

"Tamao!" Pirika called to her as she swiftly exited the room. She jumped out of the bed and began pacing back and forth in front of it.

"What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?" She rambled nervously. Without thinking further, she changed her clothes and ran out of the room, beating at the next room when she arrived at the door.

Ren opened the door quickly as if he had already been awake and allowed her to come inside. Horo was sound asleep on the couch and appeared completely undisturbed by the commotion.

"Ren!" She whispered fearfully, "She's gone!"

"What are you talking about?" He replied calmly.

"Tamao left! She's on her way back to the house! I don't know what to do!" She panicked.

Ren frowned at the news and sighed heavily, "There's nothing we can do," he said calmly.

"What?"

"Do you want to follow her?" He asked.

"She's in love with him! Don't you think this is bad for her? What if something happens?" Pirika said, irritated by his calmness.

"Tamao knows she doesn't have a chance with Yoh," he said, "but she wants to protect him. This may not necessarily be a bad thing."

"Her heart is going to be broken no matter what happens, Ren. You know that," she replied angrily.

"We'll make things worse if we follow her," Ren said sternly, "She'll be fine."

* * *

Tamao hadn't realized how far the hotel was from the house, and had been walking for what seemed like days. When she finally reached the front garden she was hesitant to enter the house, and she was beginning to perspire. Biting her bottom lip nervously, she walked around the house, peering desperately into the windows in an attempt to find Yoh. Before she reached the back of the house she stopped at one of the back windows after seeing a dim light. She cupped her hands around her eyes and pressed against the glass to get a better look. There was a lamp on a small table inside the room, and its light illuminated the room dimly like a warm candle. Directly in front of her she realized Anna was lying on the floor fast asleep and curled into a tight ball. The thin blanket, which appeared to be yellow from the light, covered her entire body with the exception of her head, neck and shoulders. This scene bothered Tamao slightly, especially since Anna appeared to be naked, though she had no idea why. It took several moments before she noticed Anna wasn't alone.

Yoh was sitting on the floor with his legs crossed directly beside her. He was fully dressed in a black collared shirt with short sleeves and beige linen pants. His body was completely still as he stared at her, and his hands rested on his knees. Now that she found him, she had absolutely no idea what to do. She stared at him anxiously as she tried coming up with her next move. The thoughts in her mind were more confusing than before, and she suddenly had doubts about her decision. She wondered why he was dressed so early in the morning, and why Anna was asleep on the floor instead of in her bed. Then she thought about the time spent away from the house. Did they talk at all? If they did, what was said? What's happening now? Her confusion suddenly grew into a mixture of fear and anger and she waited for Yoh to move.

After several minutes of Tamao watching him sit in front of Anna as a statue, Yoh stood abruptly and exited the bedroom. The sudden move startled her and she ran to the front of the house to catch another glimpse of him. Several seconds later he emerged from the front door and began walking swiftly into the woods.

"I have to follow him," she whispered. Running initially to catch up with him, she began following him quietly while keeping a healthy distance so she wouldn't be discovered.

He began talking to himself as his pace slowed, but she couldn't decipher any of his words. She noticed, however, that his body language revealed an anger she had never seen from him. The cold air caused her hands to shiver violently as the wind picked up its pace in the trees. Yoh appeared unaffected by the change in temperature and did not slow his pace any further.

_Where is he going?_ She thought to herself as she noticed the surroundings were becoming unfamiliar. Worry began to overwhelm her as she saw the sun beginning to rise on the horizon and knew it would remove the darkness she was using to hide. The house appeared seemingly out of nowhere when she stumbled upon it. Yoh walked quickly to the front door as if he had been there before, and Tamao hid behind one of the large trees nearby.

The knocking was rudely loud given the time of day, but Yoh continued until he heard someone approach the door. Tamao slid her body around the tree to get a closer look at the front door and was shocked when it opened.

"Hao!" She whispered, covering her mouth from the shock of hearing her own voice.

The two didn't seem to exchange any words, but he allowed Yoh to come inside and closed the door behind him. Tamao ran to a closer tree but eventually moved to the front of the house, finding a window that was slightly open and tried to remain unseen. There was no way she could go back now. She had to know what they were saying to each other. Leaning her entire body against the border of the window, she was pleased when she heard their voices.

"I suppose I could say that I'm happy to see you and that this is a surprise," Hao said calmly, "but I'd be lying."

Yoh didn't speak but glared at him angrily, clenching his teeth and tightening his hands that were balled into fists.

"So what do you want?" He asked.

"You don't love her, Hao," he growled.

Hao stared at him without speaking and smiled.

"I know you don't love her. She's a toy to you. You took her away to hurt me, didn't you?" He took a few steps closer and blinked slowly.

"That's a very arrogant thing to say, Yoh," He responded calmly.

"It's not arrogant; it's the truth," Yoh spat bitterly, "You only want her because you think she's useful. You don't want her heart; only her power."

"Again," Hao sighed as if annoyed by his presence, "what do you want?"

"I want you to let her go."

He frowned at him for a few seconds then laughed, "Do you think I put a spell on her, Yoh?"

"Whatever it is you're doing, I want you to stop," he replied angrily.

"You can leave now," Hao said calmly as he walked past him to enter the hallway.

"Hao!" Yoh said angrily, "I...have something you want."

He halted his trek down the hallway and turned around slowly. As he studied Yoh's expression, he noticed he was unable to read his thoughts as if Yoh was deliberately blocking him. Refusing to appear affected by this minor setback, he smiled at him and folded his arms across his chest.

"I doubt you have anything I want, Yoh," he said coldly, "at least not anymore."

"I know you'll let her go because I have something more valuable to you than Anna," Yoh said quickly, ignoring his statement.

Hao stared at him for a few seconds, growing irritated by the confidence in his voice and expression. He sighed heavily and took a few steps forward.

"What can you possibly give me that I would want, Yoh?" He asked.

"An exchange," Yoh said calmly, "Her for me."

Yoh was unable to read his expression. His eyes were indecipherable, and the longer he looked into them, the more nervous he became.

"Although you are definitely weak enough to play the role of a woman, I have no interest in you," Hao said sarcastically.

"Give Anna back to me," he hesitated, biting his bottom lip, "and I'll forfeit the tournament."

Tamao took several steps backward away from the window and covered her mouth to stifle the gasp that escaped her lips. _What is he doing?!_

Hao tilted his head slightly to the left as he stared at him, "You would give up the Shaman Tournament for her?" He asked calmly.

Yoh closed his eyes and swallowed hard, waiting until his nervous breathing returned back to normal.

"Yes," he said weakly.

"No!" She whispered, unable to stop the tears that quickly flooded her eyes. Fear and nausea overwhelmed her suddenly and she began running swiftly back the way she came. There was no destination in her mind, but she had to get away as if witnessing a terrible nightmare.

They stood completely still without speaking for several seconds. Hao stared at him with a slight frown as Yoh avoided his eyes and stared at the floor.

"Hmm," Hao replied finally, stepping closer, "I didn't realize how weak you are until now. How sickening."

"I don't care what you think about me, Hao," Yoh replied angrily.

"Obviously."

"You wanted me out of the way so you could become the Shaman King. I'm giving you that chance," he sighed.

"You're assuming you had relevance in me achieving this goal," Hao said calmly, "Did you think you were going to stop me?"

"Hao," Yoh sighed weakly, "Please...just let her go."

"You're serious, aren't you?"

Yoh didn't respond but Hao sensed the desperation in his eyes as he matched his gaze. After taking a few moments to stare at his defeated twin blankly, he suddenly smiled at him.


	11. Explanation

**Explanation**

The sun was barely on the horizon as she made her way through the woods. Although there was no rain present, thunder rang through the sky as if issuing a stern warning. She paused for a few seconds and slowed her pace as her mind raced with random thoughts. The black dress she was wearing waved rapidly against her legs as the wind picked up in pace. Sighing heavily, she closed her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. There was an ounce of relief she felt when waking to find herself alone in her bedroom, but now she was worried about Yoh's whereabouts. None of the others came back to the house either, and she had no idea why. "It doesn't matter now," she said aloud in an attempt to clear her thoughts. Her pace slowed where she was almost not moving forward at all when she reached the house. Staring at the front door for a few seconds, she exhaled slowly and closed her eyes.

The door opened without her needing to knock in its usual manner, as if he always anticipated her arrival. She noticed he had probably been awake for a while since he was wearing a white collared shirt with dark denim jeans. He stared at her blankly for a few seconds but didn't move away from the door.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"Are you going to let me in?" She responded with a frown.

He paused for a few moments before responding, "No," then slammed the door in her face.

She stared at the wood in shock for several seconds before the anger set in. Beating on the door vigorously, she tugged at the handle and the door swung open unexpectedly. She stepped inside, realizing he hadn't locked it and saw him walking down the hallway.

"Hao!" She screamed at him.

He turned around slowly and sighed, rolling his eyes before speaking, "What do you want, Anna?"

"What...was that?" She asked angrily.

"I really don't have the patience for a temper tantrum today," he replied coldly.

Anna stared at him without speaking for several moments too angry to form a sentence. She had no idea why he was treating her so rudely, but was deeply offended that he had the nerve to. The thoughts she had before resurfaced, and she began to doubt her decision.

"Tell me the truth," she said angrily.

"About what?" He asked calmly.

"You said you love me. Why?" Her voice quivered as she spoke, as if she didn't want to hear his answer.

"Would you have preferred for me to say I hate you?"

"Answer the question," Anna snapped at him and folded her arms tightly over her chest.

"I thought you would be happy about that; I suppose I was wrong," he said blankly.

"Answer me!"

"Why are you yelling?"

His evasiveness fueled an anger inside she hadn't felt in ages. Why was he avoiding the question? Perhaps Yoh was right. It was possible that Ren was correct in his reaction. Thoughts of anger and resentment suddenly flooded her mind and she exploded.

"Why can't you answer me?!" She screamed, "Is everything just a game to you? I'm not a toy, Hao! This is my life! If you don't love me you shouldn't have said it. If you don't want to marry me...you shouldn't have said it!"

"You should calm down," his tone didn't change.

"Unbelievable," she sighed as she began pacing back and forth in front of him. How could she fall for this? How could she have been so gullible? "I hate you," she spat bitterly.

"If you hated me, you wouldn't waste the energy to scream at me," Hao paused and watched her for a few seconds before continuing, "or cry."

She stared at him and shook her head, allowing the tears to flow freely down her cheeks, "I'm an idiot," she said softly, "a complete idiot."

"You're not an idiot," he said calmly, "you just make rash, emotional decisions."

"I don't make emotional decisions," she growled.

"Every decision you've made has been fueled by your emotions. As a matter of fact, you've been acting very irrationally lately."

"...What?" She stared at him in shock as if he were speaking a language she didn't understand.

"Do you think I've always been able to read your thoughts?" He asked as he took a few steps forward.

She was suddenly unable to think of an answer and she slowly blinked her eyes. He noticed her hesitation and continued.

"You've let your emotions control all of your decisions and as a result, your power has become weak."

"I'm not weak," she whispered.

"And now you're in denial," he sighed, "You're of no use to me if you're powerless."

She stared at him for a few seconds as she tried to process his last statement in her brain, "No use to you?" She repeated breathlessly.

"Why did you come here?" Hao asked blankly, ignoring her discovery. He showed no emotion, but his eyes were cold.

"I..." she hesitated.

"Honestly, it doesn't matter," he said coldly, interrupting her, "I don't need you anymore; I have what I want."

She continued to stare at him without speaking and all of her limbs were frozen in place.

"I guess you fell for me then?"

Silence filled the room for several seconds. He stared at her as if waiting for an answer to his question. She stared at the floor for a few seconds and swallowed hard before returning his gaze.

"What a shame," he said with a smile, "I was really starting to like you."

"What?" Her eyes remained fixed on him, as if witnessing a terrible train wreck.

"You should be on your way then," Hao said as his smile faded, "I'm sure Yoh will wait for you."

"Are you serious?" She whimpered.

"What part did you not understand?" He asked calmly.

"You can't be serious?" Her hands began to tremble violently as she spoke.

"Oh," he replied with a small giggle, "You wanted me to answer your question, right?"

Her mouth was open, but she didn't speak.

"If I hadn't said those things, you wouldn't have come back. I had to keep you here as long as possible."

She suddenly felt the nausea rise in her stomach as he spoke and she closed her eyes.

"And of course, Yoh noticed," he continued, "So he decided to save you."

The nausea grew worse and she groaned, clutching her chest and bending over.

"It was pretty pathetic of you both. I have to admit, Anna, I didn't expect you to break so easily."

Anna stared at the floor as she felt the dizziness overwhelm her. This was too much. Memories flashed in her mind erratically as her breathing rapidly increased. Was this possible? Did she really fall this far into his trap? Disgust and anger filled her thoughts quickly as she stood upright. Dropping her hands to her sides she closed her eyes and exhaled, trying desperately not to faint.

"What are you doing?" He asked as he took a few steps closer to stand in front of her.

She opened her eyes quickly when he approached her and slapped him hard in the face. The force was enough to steal his balance for a few seconds and he frowned at her.

"Who do you think you are?" She asked angrily.

He stared at her but didn't respond.

"No one makes a fool of me! No one!" She yelled, lifting her hand to slap him again.

He caught her wrist before she could make contact but didn't speak.

"Let go of me!" She was frustrated from losing control and began hitting him with her other hand.

Hao grabbed her other wrist quickly and pinned her arms behind her back to keep her from hitting him. She groaned in anger but was unable to escape his grasp, so she began kicking him in the leg.

"Stop it," he said finally, "You're acting like a child."

"Let go of me, Hao!" The anger in her demand was diluted by her tears.

He released her with much force, causing her to fall back onto the floor. She recovered quickly, but only rose to her knees when he spoke again.

"Get out," he said coldly as he began walking toward the hallway.

"Don't walk away from me!" She screamed angrily as she clutched her chest with her hand.

He stopped walking but didn't turn around to look at her, "Stop embarrassing yourself and," he paused for a few seconds, "Just leave, Anna."

Watching him walk away intensified her wrath, and she rose quickly to her feet. Her body burned with an immense heat as she approached him. Hao knew she was behind him, but continued walking and pretended to ignore her. When she hit him hard in the back of his head, forcing his upper body forward, he had to stop his trail. The attack progressed as she began hitting him repeatedly in his back, neck and head furiously. The blows were painful, but he refused to grimace.

"I'm not a fool!" Anna screamed at him, slapping and punching him as hard as she could.

He turned around and caught a merciless punch in the face.

"I'm not...a fool!" She repeated as tears fell quickly from her eyes.

He caught one of her arms but she swung at him fiercely with the other and began kicking him anywhere her legs would reach.

"Anna, stop," Hao said sternly, but she wasn't listening to him. She slapped him again and he pushed her back, causing her body to hit the wall behind her, "Why are you still here?" He asked.

Instead of answering his question Anna attacked him again, hitting him hard in the chest with her fists. He grabbed both of her wrists and pushed her again, sending her back into the wall. This repeated exchange was infuriating and she lost herself.

"How could you do this to me?" She paused, momentarily surprised by her words.

Hao stared at her silently and his expression was enigmatic, as if his emotions were obsolete.

"I love you."

He continued to stare at her without speaking and didn't move.

Anna closed her eyes bitterly and sighed when she realized she made the statement out loud, "I hate you so much," she whispered without looking at him. The tears flowed uncontrollably down her cheeks, and she leaned her back against the wall weakly, burying her face in her hands. She didn't want to cry. Crying was the ultimate testament of weakness, and she was furious that she allowed herself to completely lose control. It was one thing to feel like an idiot, but another to completely make a fool out of yourself in front of the person who put you there. She quickly removed her hands and folded her arms across her chest, exhaling deeply and staring at his feet.

He stood directly across from her leaning against the wall behind him quietly watching her breakdown. Although she wasn't looking at him, he stared into her eyes attentively as if waiting for her to elaborate.

"Why am I still here?" She whispered resentfully.

"Because...you love me," he responded slowly, although he knew the question wasn't directed at him.

She wiped away her tears quickly with one hand and groaned, "Don't talk to me."

"You came here for that reason?" He asked, ignoring her contempt.

When she noticed his feet were moving away from the wall she lifted her head slightly and stared at his face, avoiding his eyes. He stepped directly in front of her until he was inches from her lips.

"What are you doing?" The demand started off strong but quickly trailed off into a weak whisper as she glanced into his eyes.

"You love me?" He asked again, ignoring her discomfort.

"It doesn't matter," she said quickly, "Move."

"Yes it does," he continued to stare at her.

Anna was suddenly furious and pushed his shoulders back. He managed to take everything away from her with the exception of her pride, and she was determined to leave with it, "MOVE."

"I've never liked Yoh," he said softly, purposely ignoring her request, "His existence baffles me."

"I don't care," she groaned weakly.

"His personality disgusts me," he continued stepping closer until he was able to brush the skin of her cheek with his lips.

"I said...I don't care," she said faintly as she closed her eyes briefly and her breathing increased in pace.

"You don't love him, do you?" Hao pulled back a few inches to stare into her eyes after whispering the words in her ear. His expression was irritatingly indecipherable, and she concluded it was some type of technique he must have practiced over time.

"I'm not playing this...game anymore," she spat bitterly, "You wanted me to leave so badly earlier, so you're getting your wish!"

She pushed him back harder than before and began walking away from him quickly but was only able to take a few steps before he grabbed her arm and pulled her back against the wall in front of him. Anna was deeply frustrated that he was much stronger than her, but this knowledge didn't keep her from challenging him. Attempting to flee again, she pushed him and took a few more steps before he grabbed her again. She growled and slapped him, but he appeared unaffected by the blow and kept her pinned against the wall securely.

"Let go of me," she said finally, pausing to take a few deep breaths.

"I don't think you do," he said as if the entire exchange was erased from his memory.

Anna stared at him with a slight frown without speaking as he gently moved a few strands of her hair away from her face. His actions bothered her greatly, but she couldn't force her body into submission to leave.

"Stop," she whimpered, "What are you doing?"

"You should stay," he said calmly, finally showing a small amount of emotion with a smile.

"Are you insane?" She asked angrily.

He took a few steps back to allow her to pace back in forth in front of him. She began mumbling something inaudible under her breath before continuing.

"You can't do this to me! I wont' allow it! You can't control me. I'm not a toy!" She yelled at him, "You don't get to win this game, Hao. I'm leaving!"

"I told you this isn't a game," he said calmly, watching her pace slow, "I owe you an apology."

"You have some nerve telling me..." she paused for a few seconds and stared at him, "...What did you say?"

"When Yoh asked me to leave you, I assumed you were in love with him," he started.

"Yoh? You...talked to Yoh? When? Why?" She stumbled over her words for a few moments but he continued without addressing her question.

"His weakness didn't rub off on you like I thought," he appeared relieved by the realization, "and it wouldn't be fair for you to marry a spineless child unless you love him."

"You...I don't...What?" Anna stared at him in shock, unable to piece together a coherent sentence in her brain.

"I was trying to get you to leave, but you didn't accept it," he paused and giggled, "because you love me and you want to be here."

Anna was suddenly confused. She wanted to be angry. He insulted her intelligence and even claimed to be using her all along. But for some reason, the rage she felt dissipated and was replaced with shock. She swallowed hard and blinked a few times before speaking.

"What is wrong with you?"

Hao was visibly surprised by the question but answered it anyway, "I'm in love with you."

"Is this a joke?" She asked with a frown.

"I told you I love you because that's the truth," he added, ignoring her question, "I want you to marry me. That's why I said it."

"But..." she hesitated, "You just said..."

"Yoh wanted me to leave you. I had to say something to drive you away," he interrupted her, "but that didn't seem to work anyway."

She opened her mouth but didn't speak for several seconds. When the sound finally surfaced she said, "Why would you listen to him?"

"You're not irrational, by the way," he took a few steps closer until he was standing directly in front of her and completely ignored her question, "but you have a short temper."

"You...Jerk!" She snapped at him suddenly. His smile faded and he stared at her with a confused frown.

"Jerk?" He repeated.

"You lied to me. How can I trust you now?" He studied her eyes and concluded she was honestly angry.

"You're serious?" He asked in an attempt to confirm.

"Hao," she sighed, "You hide your emotions too well. Every thing you say to me sounds like a lie. How am I supposed to know if you're sincere? I'm not an idiot. You can't fool me twice."

Hao stared at the wall for a few seconds as if processing her words carefully then he looked into her eyes without speaking. Anna noticed something in them that was completely new. The normal coldness was replaced with something else. Perhaps...warmth? She dismissed the notion quickly and frowned at him, crossing her arms securely across her chest and sighing heavily.

"I'm not sure you're capable of love anymore," she said coldly, "You don't know what it means."

"Are you trying to insult me?" He asked without breaking his eye contact.

"No," she replied, "Hao..." she hesitated, "You see gentleness as weakness, and they're not the same thing. It's important to be...warm."

"I'm very gentle," he said blankly.

"Yoh is gentle," she sighed, "You're...not."

"You don't want to marry Yoh, but you want me to become him?" He asked with a frown.

"No," she exhaled and bit her bottom lip. The thought of having to explain her feelings frustrated her, "...I shouldn't have to guess how you feel. I should know that you love me, without any hesitation. You should want me because you want to make me happy and not because you're comfortable."

"Do you think I'm selfish, Anna?" She noticed he seemed very offended by her words.

"You've spent too much time alone," she said softly.

"Why would I have given myself completely to you knowing you were asking the same from Yoh?" He asked angrily.

"I've never..." she started.

"You're unbelievable, Anna," He said, interrupting her, "If you wanted to marry a man like him, why did you come here in the first place? If you don't want to be here, leave."

Anna returned his angry glare with one of her own, and they stood in front of each other in silence for a few moments. After studying his expression she suddenly smiled.

"You were jealous?" She asked warmly.

"Did you hear what I said?" He frowned.

"You wouldn't be this upset if you didn't care," She added.

"You're irritating me," He replied coldly.

"I can't believe I fell for that," she sighed, "There's no way I would have allowed you to use me."

"Are you leaving or not?" He asked angrily.


	12. Justice

**Justice**

She sat quietly on the bench in the park as the pink strands of her hair blew in the wind. Her eyes had become puffy and adorned with large dark circles as she struggled to stay awake. She folded her arms across her chest slightly, shielding it from the cold, and stared at the fluttering grass aimlessly, "It's cold out here," she said softly.

He didn't respond and continued staring at the nearby trees. They had been sitting on the bench for an extended period of time without speaking. When she found him in the park earlier she wasn't sure what to say to him, and he didn't seem to acknowledge her presence. The wind tickled his skin mercilessly, causing goose bumps to develop all over his arms and neck, but he didn't notice. After several minutes of silence he finally spoke.

"I don't know what else to do."

"Yoh," she hesitated for a few moments, wanting to say the right thing, "You can't make someone love you if they don't."

"She loves me. I know she loves me," he frowned, closing his eyes briefly, "But I don't think it's enough."

"You can't let him win," she said quickly, biting her bottom lip, "You can't give up so easily. She needs to know you will fight for her. He can't just…" she hesitated, "…take her away from you. He doesn't have that power."

Yoh stared at her for a few moments and noticed the anger in her eyes, "Tamao?" He started.

"What is it?" She asked.

"Why did you come back?" He continued to stare at her blankly as she spoke.

"I wanted to help you," she said nervously, "I wanted you to know you're not alone."

"You're angry?" He asked.

"You don't deserve this," she sighed, "No one deserves this."

He watched the grass sway in the wind for a few moments and sighed, "I'd be a fool if I said I didn't see this coming."

"That doesn't make it okay," she sighed bitterly.

"This will work out," he said with a smile, "I just have to fight. I have to make her see what I see, right?"

"If she can't see how wonderful you are, she's an idiot," she mumbled.

"What?" He asked calmly, "What did you say?"

"It's worth a try," she said with a smile, "We should probably get back to the house."

"You're right," he said as he stood abruptly.

Tamao followed Yoh down the dirt path a few feet before he stopped and turned around. He stared at her for a few moments without speaking and held her hand.

"What's wrong?" She asked timidly.

"You're a very good friend, Tamao," he said warmly, "Thank you."

She blushed slightly and smiled, "I'm happy to be your friend," she said.

They continued to hold hands as they walked down the path back to the house. She exhaled and blinked slowly as the warmth of his hand reenergized her body. He tightened his grip gently and slowed his pace before speaking again.

"Do you think she's asleep?" His tone was weak as if he needed reassurance.

"She's probably wondering where her breakfast is," Tamao replied. Although she was serious, the comment caused him to giggle nervously and he smiled at her.

"Probably," he said jokingly.

"Um, Yoh?" She started.

"Yes?" He asked eagerly.

"I don't think I should be there when you talk to her," she said as she stared at the ground.

"But, I want you to be there," he said pleadingly.

"I'll come to the house," she sighed, "But I don't want to be in the room. This is a private matter, and you two should be alone."

She didn't want to tell him that the possibility of seeing them work out their problems and reconcile made her queasy, nor that the chance of seeing him cry was even more unbearable. As much as she didn't want to be involved, she couldn't force herself to break away from the situation. She felt he needed her, even if it was painful for her to be there.

"Okay," he said softly.

When they approached the front of the house Yoh seemed to be in a better mood. He was calm and somewhat cheerful, and he increased his pace to reach the front door. Tamao released his hand and walked behind him, staring at the back of his head worriedly. He opened the door slowly, and she held her breath when they stepped inside. Tamao darted down the hallway and disappeared as Yoh made his way to the sitting room. Anna watched television for hours in that room, and he was always able to find her there when he needed permission to do something or just wanted the company. He opened the door cheerfully when he heard noises inside, but paused abruptly when he saw her.

Anna was in the room, but the television was turned off and she was standing in the middle of it staring at him. She wore a beige dress that covered her knees, and he blond hair rested on her shoulders, covering most of her face as usual. He wasn't really staring at her, however, for the bags that sat at her feet drew more attention.

"What are you doing?" He asked with a frown.

"I'm leaving," she said simply.

"Where are you going?" He asked, already knowing the answer, "When will you be back?"

"I'm not coming back, Yoh," she said blankly. He noticed a slight look of disappointment in her eyes as she spoke. She wanted to be gone before he returned to avoid this conversation.

"So that's it? You're just going to leave?" He asked as the anger began to quickly set in.

"Yoh," she sighed heavily, "I don't want to do this with you."

"Do what?" He asked as his tone elevated slightly, "Answer me when I ask you a question? I have the right to know, Anna," He paused to exhale and clenched his hands into fists.

"I don't have to explain myself to you," she said angrily, "I told you I'm leaving. That's all you need to know."

Yoh seemed surprised by her statement but frowned when he spoke again, "I can't believe you're doing this."

"Excuse me?" She replied.

"You're throwing your life away. You're ruining your chance at happiness…our chance. And for what? For…HIM?" He paused again as his hands began to tremble violently.

"I'm not throwing a life that I want away," she sighed, "I'm doing what's best…"

"For who?" He interrupted her, "For you? You're not doing this for me!" He yelled at her suddenly, and she was visibly surprised, "I can't believe you would leave the man that loves you for a guy who wants to be entertained! How could you be so…STUPID?!"

She frowned suddenly and slapped him hard across the face. He stumbled for a few seconds and groaned. When he recovered, she slapped him again and he fell on the floor.

"I'm not stupid, Yoh," she growled.

He stood up again and stared at her without speaking for a few seconds then closed his eyes, "Are you trying to hurt me?" He asked weakly, "Do you hate me that much?"

"I don't hate you," she said as her voice began to falter.

"Why are you torturing me like this?" He asked. When she noticed the tears rolling quickly down his cheeks she looked away from him and stared at the wall.

"Please don't make this harder than it has to be," she sighed.

"You…can't just leave," he whimpered.

Anna stood still for a few moments and swallowed hard. She knew the tears were about to completely fill her eyes, but she couldn't stop them. He was making her uncomfortable. Closing her eyes made the reality worse, and they spilled over her lashes and raced down her cheeks before she could react, "I can't do this with you," she said weakly.

"Anna please," he whispered, "Please don't leave."

She grabbed her bags suddenly, one in each hand, and began walking to the door, "This conversation is over," she said sadly.

He grabbed her waist before she could reach the door, causing her to drop the bags. She groaned in frustration but did not free herself as he pulled her close to his body and held her tightly in his arms.

"Tell me what you want from me," he said, "Tell me what I should do."

"There's nothing you can do," she whispered as her lips quivered violently.

"Tell me how to fix this, Anna," he pleaded, "Please, just tell me how to make this right."

She wrapped her arms around his neck and shoulders and hugged him tightly, "I'm sorry Yoh. I never meant to hurt you; you have to believe that," she sniffed.

"We can fix this," he whispered in her ear, "I know we can fix this."

"Yoh," she sighed.

"I know we can make this work," he continued, "I love you, Anna. Please, please don't leave me!"

"Stop this!" She snapped, pushing him away from her, "I have to do this, Yoh. Just…stop!"

He watched her as she hastily grabbed her bags again and exited into the hallway, and he followed her after the initial shock wore off. Tamao had been standing in the hallway near the front door the entire time, and was surprised to see the bags Anna was carrying. She gasped involuntarily and covered her mouth, but neither Yoh nor Anna seemed to notice her.

"Anna, wait!" He called to her.

"I said I don't want to do this with you," she replied angrily.

"What are you doing, Anna?" Tamao whispered.

She carefully sat her bags on the floor near the front door and paused. Something was restraining her. She closed her eyes in frustration and tried to clear her thoughts. What was she waiting for? _It shouldn't end like this,_ she thought to herself suddenly. Why was she angry with him? He was only doing the natural thing. He didn't want her to leave. He loved her. Why was she treating him so badly? After all, this wasn't his fault. She had set these events into motion weeks before, and had no one to blame for the outcome except…

"This is my fault," she mumbled under her breath.

"What?" Yoh didn't hear her, and was desperate to know if there was a possibility she would change her mind.

"You're right," Tamao whispered angrily.

"I'm sorry, Yoh. I was being selfish. I wasn't thinking of you or anyone else. But…I can't change that now."

"Everything is fixable, Anna. I can fix this," he said sadly.

"No, you don't understand," she paused and bit her bottom lip.

"Explain it to me," He said as he stepped closer, "Tell me what I need to know."

"I love him."

"…What?" Yoh stumbled a few steps back but regained his composure quickly.

"And he loves me," she continued, ignoring the apparent disgust in Tamao's eyes.

"No…" he wanted to say more, but the sudden pain in his chest quickly expelled his will to speak.

"I wasn't trying to hurt you, Yoh," she sighed, "But I love him."

He fell to his knees as his head began to spin from the sudden nausea.

"I'm going to marry him," she continued, "I'm going because I want to be there."

Tamao closed her eyes and clenched her teeth as Anna spoke. Yoh stared at the floor, unable to regain his footing, and his breathing slowed.

"Yoh?" Anna called to him worriedly.

Tamao crouched on the floor beside him and placed her arm over his shoulders, "Yoh, are you okay?" She asked.

"I can't breathe," he said weakly.

"Yoh!" Anna ran quickly to his side and reached out to him, but Tamao slapped her hand.

"Don't touch him!" She growled at her.

"Tamao," Anna tried to protest, but Tamao stared at her indignantly, holding Yoh tighter.

"Get away from him," she said angrily.

He opened his mouth to speak, but stopped and continued staring at the floor.

"It's okay, Yoh," Tamao said softly, "She's leaving now."

Anna was sitting on her knees in front of them with her hands resting on her thighs. She sighed heavily and closed her eyes for a few moments. Yoh knew she was there, but couldn't find the strength to sit up. Tamao remained crouched beside him and had wrapped both arms around his shoulders, glaring at Anna.

"Yoh," she started, clutching her dress in her hands, "I don't expect you to understand this. I hope you can forgive me…someday."

"How could you do this to him?" Tamao whispered bitterly.

"I guess this is goodbye," she continued. When he didn't respond, she stood on her feet and paused before turning for the door.

Yoh pulled away from Tamao suddenly, forcing her to release him and stopped Anna before she could turn around. He wrapped his arms tightly around her hips and buried the side of his face in her stomach, "Please don't leave!" He cried hysterically.

"Stop it," Tamao groaned.

Anna began to cry uncontrollably and her hands trembled violently as she ran her fingers through his hair, "Please get up," she said weakly.

"Don't do this," he pleaded, "Please don't do this! I love you!"

"Stop it, Yoh," Tamao repeated angrily.

"Please let go of me," she sniffed.

He tightened his arms and sobbed bitterly. Anna tried to pry them off, but his grip was too strong. Tamao stood in front of them with her arms crossed and stared angrily at the front door.

"Yoh, please listen to me," Anna sighed, "Just let me go."

Yoh released her suddenly and sat quietly on his knees staring at her legs. Anna was surprised by the movement, but took the opportunity to open the front door and gather her bags. Tamao stood beside him and placed her hand on his shoulder as they watched her leave. Anna turned around to look at them for a few seconds before stepping outside and closing the door behind her. When the latch connected he exhaled weakly and stared at the floor.

"What took you so long?" He asked as he grabbed the bags from her and kissed her softly on the lips.

"When did you get here?" Anna was surprised Hao showed up so quickly, but she was relieved he was there.

As they made their way quietly through the woods, she stared at his hair as she walked beside him. Suddenly all of the guilt she felt before was replaced with happiness and longing. He noticed she was observing him and smiled at her. After a few more moments of silence he decided to speak.

"What did you say to him?" He asked.

"I told him I was leaving," she said quickly.

"You really broke his heart, didn't you?" Hao asked with a smirk.

"I'm not proud of it," she said weakly.

"Well he must feel like an idiot now," he said calmly.

"What are you talking about?" She asked with a frown.

Without looking at her he said, "He decided to forfeit the tournament."

"…What?" She stared at him wide eyed for a few seconds and gasped, falling behind him as her pace slowed.

"And you still left," he continued, "What a kick in the face."

She continued to stare at him without speaking as if in shock and stopped walking completely.

"But, it would be merciless for me to kill him now," he said in a tone almost resentful. When he noticed she was very quiet, he turned around and smiled at her.

Her facial expression didn't change and she took a few steps backward.

"You should be proud of yourself," he said calmly, "You saved his life."

He continued down the path with her bags and she remained behind him, folding her arms across her chest.

"Yoh," she whispered fearfully.

**THE END**

* * *

_**Thank you for reading the story. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing it. Please review, if you haven't already.**_

_**Part II coming soon…**_

_**-Pulchrite**_


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